September 2021 – Two Cents Worth of Mom Life

As summer is on its way out, I wanted to tell you about our little fish we discovered this summer!

Our son became quite the daredevil on vacation when it came to swimming, and we were so impressed. Mainly because before that week, he only dabbled in a bit of the water activities with caution.

Our family is around water a lot. My husband and I grew up around the water our whole lives. Mine being at the lake house with family learning to ski and kneeboard. My husband being around water always fishing at lakes or the ocean. Water is a big part of what we enjoy with our time off and with family and friends, so my son is around it a lot as well!

We always hoped he would love the water. I think we’re on the right track so far!

From 2 weeks old I’ve been taking him to the family lake house. Since then, he’s been on the fishing boat with dad regularly or with mom on the speed boat.

2 week old nugget at our family lake house

What I have never wanted to do was scare him of the water. Each kid is different, and I’ve had people tell me all sorts of things about how we should do it. You know, the opinions you never asked for that I’ve mentioned before. *eye roll*

We are around water so much we want him to respect it and love it. One moment can scare him to not want to enjoy it and that’s where I know the entire process must be on his terms, with our help and watchful eyes, of course.

Throughout this summer we have been encouraging him to have more time in the water with us. We had taken him on the tube behind the boat at the beginning of summer. We did three loops around our cove, though it may have appeared he did not like it because he kept putting his head down while riding between my husband and me. He made the calls to keep going each time we would ask.

My husband was also able to take him to the wave pool by our home a few times this summer before we had gone to the beach which I give a lot of credit to his confidence in the water.

The wave pool has the gradient entry, like the beach. It allowed him to choose the pace to get in and what he was comfortable with.

Now I do need to put in the fact that he is a boy so the confidence level seems to increase rapidly with anything he learns he can do on his own.

I know our son is more cautious than some kids can be. I am not sure how, but I’ll take it as a mom because my heart can only handle so much!

Two things that I like to believe helped him get to where he is with enjoying the water is our confidence in him to trust us being there and bathtub play time. This is specifically with my son obviously, as he’s my first child and we can only do what we know and feel comfortable with as parents. I had not read what to do or how to introduce them as some may. We did not do swim lessons that I had first believed we would do.

We went with our gut and our own experience in water and how we learned and felt comfortable with growing up around it. It’s consistent conversation among me and my husband on how we think he did or what we may want to try next.

To be honest, my parents remind me that my first-time swimming in a pool was with a stranger on vacation. They were there, but I did not want to go into the water with them. It’s now funny but shows kids all learn on their own circumstances.

When we got to the beach this year of course we went to the ocean on day one. He loved the sand to build and knock down castles. The best part of it was him “jumping” in the waves.

He would jump and plop right on his bum. The best way to visualize it is doing a seat drop on a trampoline. That’s what he would do to “jump the waves.” 😂

Those waves would smack him, and he would stand right back up! Knowing mom, dad and grandma were close, he kept playing hard. That is one thing we try hard not to do, panic, and grab him when he falls down. He was not hurt when the waves would hit him and we would encourage him to hop up and that is just what he did.

He wanted to go out deeper a few times, but we told him we had to carry him. That’s where the mom and dad being there to show caution would come in for him that we do put a limit on what we know he can or cannot handle.

The pool became a favorite spot of his though because there were other big kids to watch and mimic.

That helped significantly with his confidence in the water. He wants to be a big kid so badly and will attempt to do what they do. He is a watch and see or monkey-see, monkey-do kind of kid.

He was jumping off the edge holding our hands and even began letting his face go under water. He would dip his face in the water when the others would dip under and hold their breath for their parents to count how long they could hold it. He began to go off the steps by himself to swim towards us. He would spin around and around. It kept getting more fun for him as he saw what he could do.

It was so fun for us all to watch him gain confidence in himself with swimming and trying to do more in the water each day.

We had a few parents surprised of his age when they had their kids there either not getting in or were older and had not tried what he was at the same age. It made us feel good because again, it was all on his terms. None of it happened because we pushed him too much.

If we asked him to try something and he said no, we stopped asking in that moment. Not to say we didn’t ask again the next day to see if he would want to try. A few times he did change his mind, but our son is someone who makes up his mind and it is exactly what he wants. There is not changing his mind. I hope that remains in his life forever. Stick to his gut.

We are both very happy where he is with his swimming skills at a young age. He’s no Michael Phelps at age 2, but he’s also not afraid of it. I love exactly where he is and it’s because of his own choices to get there.

I want to say I’ll never push him too hard, but that’s not true. I know for a fact though; he will get where he’s going because of his own choices just like this has been.

I cannot wait to get him to the water again and keep seeing him swim and enjoy the water like we always have!

We recently went on vacation to Myrtle Beach, SC and had a great time! I have a few blogs to share with you that came to mind while there.

One specific day was awesome day with our son. Most were, but this story is about one day in particular.

I mean it. It was a storybook kind of day on our vacation at the beach.

We went to the beach in the morning. He ran, destroyed sand castles, jumped waves and got buried in the sand. He was a happy little man and had us all enjoying our time.

We all walked to lunch a few blocks away so we could eat beachside and have a fun drink. We pushed him on his tricycle the whole way there too. He even got a virgin strawberry daiquiri and felt so cool.

When we got back he took a long nap. My husband and I snuck away for some beach time until grandma and pap met us at the pool with him.

We swam together, dunked, splashed. You name it, we did it.

We convinced him to head upstairs for dinner and we all got ready then headed to a nice delicious dinner out. He even danced to a live band near the restaurant afterwards. He was making people laugh that were around us and making us chuckle at his little dance moves.

Then we take a turn and all shit breaks lose.

We went to the park for a few rides on the big kids slide because he wants to be a big kid so bad. We followed him around a bit and then suggested ice cream. Afterall, it is vacation.

He picked his flavor of cake batter, said “thank you,” waved bye to the gentleman who scooped it for him… and then saw the merry-go-round.

Grandma lit up and offered to take him so my husband found where to buy tickets for it. In that moment my son geeked out and decided he wanted the choo choo train ride instead.

There was no convincing him otherwise.

We had to go buy additional tickets and then the train came in and he ran right to the engine, where he cannot ride, and when told no he flipped his lid. The guy running this stood still while my husband tried to wrangle him into the one to ride and my mom attempted to convince him to go in.

It was a total disaster.

My husband became irritated, my mom wasn’t sure what to do to help, my dad stepped back and I came to grab my son saying enough was enough because he didn’t need to ride it. The other kids had loaded and were ready to go.

We were those people with the tantrum driven toddler making a scene. Initiate instant sweat and the “WTF” mode. When I say “those people,” I’m referring to the ones you judged before you had kids and wondered why they would LET their kid act that way or be so ridiculous.

Let me be clear. My husband and I do not tolerate his crap, but realistically, he is two years old and emotions are hard as well as trying to get him to understand why he can or cannot do things. Another blog to come regarding this topic. 😊

My dad handed our tickets to another kid to ride something while we wrangled in the heathen, my sweet son everyone sees him as.

He was hitting my husband out of anger because again, emotions are hard for a 2 year old, while crying so I took him from my husband thinking I could calm him down, as we began the longest journey back to our car. A 5 minute walk… which I could not change his upset mind to calm down and I became the target of hitting and screaming.

I had to grab those tiny hands of his numerous times to stop him from hitting me while explaining since he didn’t listen it was time to go home.

Any parent knows where this lead to.

The surf board carry.

Absolutely embarrassed, we stuck to staying as calm as we could walking past so many people. You can feel either judgement or acceptance from the parents that get it from having to do the same walk before. I did see a few moms look at me with a smile of understanding seeing us go by. It gave me a very teeny tiny sense of relief knowing they were not going to call the cops thinking we were kidnapping him.

I eventually had to tag my husband in again to take him from me. But we made it to the car. Sweaty pits and all… on me, that is.

I was so pissed off at my son I had to ignore him for a moment to calm myself down so I didn’t snap because he doesn’t understand if I would. (I have in the past.) And both my parents are in the car with us reassuring my husband and I how he did so good all day up until that point and basically saying they get it and not to be embarassed.

When we got back to our hotel it was immediately bed time. No ifs, ands or buts about it.

Thing was, he knew he messed up at this point because mama meant business and wasn’t giving in like usual.

He begged me to put him to bed.

I had to.

I needed to tell him why I was mad and why he cannot hit me or anyone. But more importantly I had to let him know I still love him even when he is angry.

We laid together for 20 minutes while he wound down. I got my good night kiss and squeezed him tight. He went to bed happy and the tears stopped. My heart hurt though because of the situation we had.

The real point is that two year olds are perfectly tough. We had the very best day with him. Then we didn’t.

I couldn’t finish the day allowing him or myself to be unhappy with one another. Sure, I am still upset it ended the way it did and even apologized to my parents for his behavior and having to leave but they get it.

Kids are learning life and we have to help the best we can, even if it is by doing the surf board carry past tons of people either judging us or accepting us knowing they did it before too.